Self absorbed…Get a clue.

I know that this is supposed to be a writing blog…meaning a blog about writing. And I’ll get back to that, but I’m still fired up about this bathroom nonsense.

Now in my last post I thought I had stated all I wanted to about it, but upon further reflection I realized that I haven’t. And what follows IS personal experience. As I said in the last post, I am not transgender.

I grew up a tomboy, loved playing in the dirt with Tonka trucks, play cowboys, and Indians, ride motorcycles…hated playing with dolls, messing around in the kitchen and wearing dresses. My favorite outfit was a well-worn pair of Levi 501’s, tee shirt and boots..or sneakers. Dressing up to me meant a pressed pair of slacks, shirt and tie. Nothing much has changed through the years, except that HJ won’t let me have a motorcycle and will with  arthritis the 501’s are out.

I am female, I use the women’s restroom and even though I am using the restroom that matches my gender, I am very uncomfortable. I can not tell you how many times I have been walking into the restroom only to be stopped by someone walking out or an employee of the store, and being told that I’m going into the wrong restroom. It’s enough that I try very hard to avoid using a public restroom, and if I can’t then I have HJ go with me. How in the lords name is this right?


Do I look female?


Can you imagine being told you are going into the wrong restroom? It’s uncomfortable, it can be scary, and it’s humiliating to have to explain that no you are indeed going into the correct room, and still be questioned and treated like you are lying. I’ve even gone so far as to open my jacket and pull my shirt tight around me to show my breasts. And this is simply because I do not match people’s perceptions of what all women should look like.

I am educated enough to understand and know that someone who has gone through their entire life having to deal with a body that does not match their inside idea or feeling of who they are, are trying to live honestly. That if a person is born in a female’s body but feels male inside is going to dress and behave in a manner that is real to them. And a male that feels like a woman inside is going to do the same. What is so wrong with that? A straight person isn’t being asked to be gay, they aren’t being asked to live a life that suppresses who they are inside. By forcing a transgender man to use the women’s room  or a trans woman to use the men’s room, you are suppressing and invalidating that individual. Until you have lived that person’s life you have no right to judge.

People claim to be worried about the rapists that will walk right into the women’s powder room to attack them or the pedophiles that will be there to molest our children. Why is it that you worry about it now…haven’t the rapists and pedophiles always been lurking?

Yes, rapists and pedophiles roam among us, and what do they look like…the look like teachers, doctors, comics, t.v. personalities, pro athletes. The look like fathers, husbands, sons, uncles…what you don’t like that? Neither do I. And no I’m not saying that all of the aforementioned are rapists and pedophiles. I’m saying that you can not discriminate based on presumption. It’s judgemental of me to say that all priests are pedophiles, and it’s judgemental to claim all transgender individuals are too. Again, people, we have so much more truly important problems in this world, that need our attention.



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